The Question - A Poem

Why do I suck it up
When it's so hard
To breathe
And these medications
Insinuations
Make it hard to feed

This need

I've lost 10 pounds
Since I went back
Doctoral solutions
To permanent problems
Outliers and chandeliers
I'll be cavalier
About this cancer
That they can't cut out
Of me

And all I want to know is:
What are the right questions
To ask, anyway?
All I know is this need to feed

And I bite nails until they bleed
Smoke cigarettes I can't speed;
I've lost 10 minutes since I went back
Out back
My own walk of shame
For this nicotine game
And the nurse wants me to quit
But these environmental
Elemental
Continental
Attributions keep this cancer at bay

And all I want to know is:
What are the right questions
To ask, anyway?
All I know is this need to feed

And I lick lips until they stick
Chap
And they're too dry to smack
I'm too quick to beg a bitch-slap
Attack
Rewrite
Renege
Into a come-back
I've lost 10 seconds since I went back
And my friends want me to stop
But these emotions
Commotions
Explosions
Cause the cancer to grow inside of me

And all I want to know is:
What are the right questions
To ask, anyway?
All I know is this need to feed

And that I need another cigarette
To put my aching mind at ease

©2011 ~strawberry-goodness